The first challenge, shown below, was to illustrate the quote "Motivated by good intentions". It had to be done digitally (since it was for a digital drawing class) and no additional texturing aside from the initial drawing and custom brushes was allowed.
The first one is by { Eric Pfeiffer }
This one( depicting Truman/Hiroshima) is by { Joshua Graydon }
Constructive criticism is encouraged. Your feedback may be brief, but you may go into details as well.
Thank You
Hey guys,
ReplyDeleteEach of these pieces show me that the two of you have considerable talent as designers. Both show off a solid set of skills, especially in the areas of color and drawing.
Eric:
You have an interesting way of drawing. I like the sensitivity of your line,and you seem to have captured some nice textures from your original drawing. Your sense of color is particularly beautiful.
My first comment, though, is that conceptually I'm not sure how your use of color adds to the topic. Granted, "Motivated by Good Intentions" gives a lot of room for interpretation,but making the leaves electric pink and the house a canary yellow (and drawn with vectors) makes me wonder "why," and if there it has anything to do with the concept. Your narrative is very mysterious, and if there was an article or a story to go along with it, I might want to know more.
My second comment is that you should consider going to the library a couple times a week and exploring older books and publications for artists and designers you may not have heard of before. Avoid the usual comics/animation/illustration stuff that everyone on a computer is familiar with. All the artwork that's ever been created since the the dawn of mankind is your legacy, your birth-right, so go out there and take advantage of it. Be constantly on the look-out for new perspectives that can enrich your point of view.
JOSHUA:
I like your take on the topic; I like that I can understand how you came to this idea of what to depict. Also, I really like your scratchy, self-conscious mark-making. It lends itself well to the chosen image, and helps to augment your knack for expressing emotion through subtle facial expression and gesture.
My first critique on the image is that I'm not sure what the reflection in the foreground is. I see light and color that might be flame, or might be an explosion. In my opinion, it would be stronger if A) either it read more clearly as to what it is, or B) it was obviously not supposed to be legible (i.e., abstract).
My second comment is on your likeness; it's not so great. A difficulty in showing likenesses in a narrative illustration, as you've done here, arises from the fact that there is usually only a limited supply of good reference out there with the type of facial expressions you need for any particular celebrity. Not to mention, if a recognizable person makes an unusual or contorted facial expression, it often doesn't look much like the person anymore once you translate it into drawing. It's possible, but difficult - to a point where I tend to shy away from such topics. If you want to do portraits that tell stories, often times the best way to go is towards symbolism, so that you can actually make use of good reference, and not have to make up the lighting (which 99 out of a hundred times will ruin the likeness).
My third and final comment is that your composition is too heavy on the right side. You should consider either moving the figure closer to the left side, or adding a bright orange color on the left, to bring the eye back across the page and balance the image.
Best,
Frank Stockton
Hi Eric! Great drawing and digital treatment! I like the way you maintain textures and work your lines.
ReplyDeleteFrank touched on an interesting point: how should illustration perform i.e should it communicate the quote so that a viewer realizes what the story is about or should it entice a viewer to read the the story? I suppose that is up to the illustrator's viewpoint. With this image, I assume the goal is to leave me with questions that will be answered in the accompanying text. When I try to apply "motivated by good intentions" to the illo, I am able to make a connection; however, I do not think I would be able to do so had I not known the theme beforehand. Again, this is not a crit of your approach; it is merely an observation that should be taken into account. Not only should you be aware of this, but you should also be aware that some certain ADs may or may not want that approach.
My assumption when looking at the image: this kid took a play fight too far, yes? He fancies himself a superhero. He favors Batman, who is a very violent hero that is motivated by good intentions (that statement in itself could be a whole other discussion :) Is my assumption of what is taking place correct? If so, the theme gets hazy for me: without knowing the theme beforehand, I could see this image being about how children idolize cartoon characters rather than this kid having good intentions and accidentally hurting others. Personally, I would drop the batman mask. In my opinion, this would strengthen the theme of "motivated by good intentions." Seeing the face of a boy having done this violent act would be much more emotional than looking at this cold masked face, and having elements in your image that a viewer can empathize with is a great place to be. Think about it: have we all not done something with good intentions that we later regretted? Showing that regret in a figure is something that a viewer can relate with, and it invests them in the image.
I find myself asking several questions when I view this piece: What does the house mean? Why are the leaves pink? Are the cropped figures dead? I think its good to create a dialogue within your viewer, but are all of these elements re-enforcing the theme? Please share with us your reasons for these choices. Were they brought upon as re-enforcement of theme or as aesthetic choice?
Eric, I enjoy your use of color very much, but Frank brought a good point of does it strengthen the concept? The scene feels very cold and emotionless; are we to assume this is the emotional state of the figure? I assume so as the figure is also almost exclusively white and blue. If so, could we not argue that a color scheme that says "lack of emotion" contradicts the theme "motivated by good intentions?"
In terms of technical skill, I think you are very capable, Eric. This piece's draftsmanship and digital rendering are very well done! My only issues in terms of technique are the rocks and the lower left foot. The rocks feel photoshopped in; their line quality is very thin and sharp in comparison to the rest of the image. The lower left foot's ankle feels out of whack, but that can be fixed with some quick observation of a leg in that position. Oh, one other thing I notice is a tangent of the figure's shorts, the tree outline, and the leg all meeting together; this is an odd tension point that you could easily correct. That part of the tree (seen under the arm) also seems to be "hugging" the figure by cutting into his side a bit. Is this intentional?
Eric, this is a technically sound piece that I fear may have been the subject of overthinking the concept. My advice would be to try to simplify and boil down your concepts and to try to find ways for readers to empathize with your subject matter.
Please feel free to contact me if I am not being clear or if you have any questions.
I will continue with Joshua's piece later today!
Enjoy the Day,
Chris
Hi, Joshua. This is a very emotional image that I find quite engaging. And taking on transparent glass is courageous!
ReplyDeleteWhen considering if the theme of the assignment works with the image, I can see the relation; good concept. As Frank said, I too have trouble discerning the likeness of Truman; when googling him, the photos and your rendering do not seem to mesh well. To get closer, I would perhaps remove the hat as it does not seem to be a needed characteristic; maybe put it in his hands?
Despite the likeness issue, I definitely am still feeling the emotion of the figure: good job! Being able to empathize with this man, I am emotionally invested in the image. You've engaged me; good job. Despite my involvement in the image, I feel you could have gotten me more invested had you chosen a different subject matter. With the likeness, I feel my generation is too young to relate to a president from before we were born. I feel the same way about the Hiroshima bombing; having happened so many years before my time, I am somewhat numb to the event. This is a tricky issue, and it depends largely on your target audience; using Truman and Hiroshima would probably work well with an older crowd like readers of AARP or a magazine along those lines, but I feel the folks who read magazines a bit more trendy or hip (youthful :) might not be able to relate to the image beyond the figure's emotional state. This could also be an issue with younger ADs in the field today: would they recognize this likeness/event in your portfolio?
To switch gears, let's discuss some technical aspects of the image. I am assuming the figure is looking through dirty glass (wiped) to see the bombing taking place? If so, it is a bit difficult to discern the glass at first; initially, I thought the dirty parts of glass were a type of haze or fog. Perhaps if you showed the figure in the act of wiping (hand on glass with a trail of clean glass), it may read more quickly?
I like the linework on the figure; you've managed to keep a human feeling in your digital image. The ear seems to not come together, and judging from the nose shadow, I do not think light would hit that area. You were correct in assuming to bring some light in there, but I would suggest a reflected light from behind that would bring out the backside of the head, collar, arm, and hat. It could also help your figure's silhouette come together. You have a good sense of light on the figure, but right now the left side of the figure seems very close to the background in terms of value and flattens out that area; the rim lighting could help this or you could also lighten either the shadow of the coat or the background.
There is need of something on the bottom left to balance the busy-ness of the right; adding such and element would move us through the image better. Maybe the source of the rim lighting suggested earlier could be behind the figure in that bottom corner. Or more smoke?
In terms of color, I am curious as to why you chose this scheme. I could have seen this image working very well with a more emotional color scheme; the colors you used are very muted and really do not evoke an emotion within me. It would be interesting to see how this image would change with either a warm scheme to hint at the explosion or maybe even a cool scheme with warm accents.
In your rendering of the explosion, I too like the mark-making. Its a bit difficult to make out the explosion at first with so much going on, but I suppose that is also true in life. Anyway, concerning the marks themselves, I would experiment with different brushes in PS as these feel mostly like the default round brush?
Joshua, you've got a strong concept and an emotional image. With future pieces, I would try to work with more universal situations with which the common viewer can relate. I would also work with more recognizable figures for likeness pieces. Great work! Please contact me if you would like to discuss anything in more detail or if you have questions!
Enjoy the Day,
Chris
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteEric,
ReplyDeleteI'm a agreeing with a lot of the stuff Frank and Chris have said, but I will repeat the necessity to take care with feet and hands in general. A bad foot or hand can make all the difference between a professional piece and student work.
Again, like Frank, I am noticing a lot of stylistic affectations that have more to do with what's currently being done in illustration than real purpose. I can see here a strong James Jean influence, but without his intention. I think a major shortcoming in many illustrators and illustration students is just what Frank said: they don't look beyond what's happening right now in their specific field. Get your inspiration from everywhere you can, and if there's an area of art, say non-representational art, that you dislike, making an effort to learn art history and to connect the dots between one art movement and another will help you to at least understand the process and reasoning behind it.
The key artist to understanding modernism for me, was Picasso, and from there I began to appreciate abstraction and abstract painting in general, but it took me a while to get there. My entry point was definitely the German expressionist movement, and I think that learning about people like George Grosz and Otto Dix, Kokosha, Egon Schielle, and the movement in general will help you understand modernism from this midpoint on, both the impressionists before them, their contemporaries, and the artists that followed. The reason I think German expressionism is a good entry point is because figurative expressionism like what you're attempting here, is very much rooted in that movement. Also I'd check out the American Ashcan school and some of the London Figurative guys like Lucian Freud, Francis Bacon and Frank Auerbach.
Joshua,
I can see some nice drawing skills here, particularly in the hands, but just like Eric needs to make more of an effort to do things with purpose, you need to make your purpose known. In an illustration you don't want to make the viewer have to decipher your image. Make sure that what you're trying to express is easily readable. In the concept stage, try to step away and think: how can I illustrate what I'm trying to say more clearly? No matter what kind of art you're making, always respect your audience. Try not to blame your audience for not understanding your picture. That is: unless they're your mom or an irritating relative. Then it's OK.
Dang I really likes these!.
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